Listening Skills

ATTITUDES OF LISTENING

1. Willingness not to do all the talking
2. Acceptance of the person to who you are listening
3. Making listening an active part of communication

WHAT IS LISTENING…

1. Sensing
   1. Selective hearing
   2. Organizational selectivity
   3. Distractions
2. Interpreting
   1. Understand
   2. Grasp
   3. Comprehend
   4. Preconception
3. Evaluation
   1. Act of appraising
   2. Assumptions
4. Responding
   1. Does not have to lead to action
   2. Should imply warmth, receptivity
   3. Non-judgmental

TECHNIQUES OF LISTENING

1. Be prepared to hear person on his/her own terms
   1. Belligerent
   2. Defensive
   3. Boring
   4. Posturing
2. Be prepared on the subject to be discussed
3. Make allowances for the speaker’s circumstances
   1. Strain/stress
   2. Prejudge relevance
   3. Emotion
4. Establish an agreeable atmosphere
   1. Put at ease
   2. A show of interest
   3. Not timed
5. Avoid getting mentally sidetracked
   1. Emotions in check
   2. Do not edit statements
   3. Day dream vs. attentive
6. Listen for and summarize basic ideas
   1. Mentally summarize 
   2. Probe uncertain areas
7. Restate the substance of what you have heard
   1. Clarify
   2. Fasten in mind the substance of what you have heard
   3. Mentally or verbally
8. Understanding the speaker’s organizational pattern
   1. Enumeration – 1^st point, 2^nd point
   2. Problem = solution: this is the problem and this is the solution
   3. Time sequence
   4. Spatial pattern: presentation information of mental pictures
9. Plan to report
   1. If you have to report, you listen better
10. Use questions to clarify, probe, enumerate

SEVEN CRITICAL PRINCIPLES OF COMMUNICATIONS

1. Communication is based on perception.
2. Perceptions are organized and structured within a brief period of time.
3. People use stereotypes to organize their perceptions.
4. People attempt to maintain their original perceptions regardless of contradictory information.
5. People are more easily influenced by others they perceive as similar to themselves.
6. The perceptions of credibility are based on three factors:
   1. Competence/expertise
   2. Trustworthiness
   3. Dynamics at work
7. People make decisions by emotion (unconscious mind) and validate them with login (conscious mind)

FIVE TIPS FOR EFFECTIVE LISTENING:

1. Work hard/discipline
2. Paraphrase
3. Check inferences
4. Empathize with speaker
5. Remember – organize – repetition - association